MVP Seminars Blogs

We each want to be the leader of our lives. Many times we don’t feel that we are, other times we feel that we are the victims of our lives. 

What is the secret of becoming the leader of your life? 

More and more people are training themselves to do just that. They want to be coached, mentored, they want the tools to grow. The movement to become self-reliant, self-motivated, self-educated and self-empowered is a dominant color in our modern culture, and that’s great. Yet, we still have a lot of difficulties doing this, and we want to know… why?

We want to understand what is the direct road to get there.

We don’t want to waste a lot of time. We want to get there at fast as we can, since life is ticking.

The question that I want to ask is, do you recognize the Inner Leader inside of yourself? If you do, do you know how to step into those shoes? Do you know how to walk in those shoes? Sometimes we know about it, kind of, theoretically. 


We feel that there is a certain power within us, or some spiritual understanding.  

We have a sense of it. But, between having a sense of it, and actually living it… living within IT, acting from there, feeling from there, thinking from there… there is a BIG difference.

This part of you, that I am calling your inner leader… the Expanded Self, is your guide. It is your healer, your inner parent, the one that holds in its consciousness your optimal life, the vision of your optimal life and the path of fulfilling your purpose and your destination. This is the part of you that can take you where you spirit /soul wants to go.

 

A lot of us have a sense of our personal power, and our wisdom, but many times we aren’t living from there.

We need to know how to tap into this part of us. How to strengthen it. We also need to know what are the other parts of us, our Defensive Self and our Emotional Self. We love these parts, we need them and we want to nurture and support them. it is just that these are not meant to be your leader.

 

There are exercise, actions, meditations, insights that you can do, that you can experience, to ground you in your inner leader.

Get the tools you need to create your inner leader strong, powerful and forward moving inner leader. Stay open to the possibilities that live within you, all that you can be is right there.

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I attended a business meeting today for which I was the facilitator and observed one individual I’ll call Michael, exhibit poor leadership skills. He had a lot to say about everything discussed and was a poor listener to other attendees who asked clarifying questions or had contrary viewpoints. Twice in the meeting he mentioned that he had been rebuffed by the group and did not care whether his views were shared by all members of the group. Quietly the chair and a few others began to try to summarize Michael’s concerns into coherent statements. This was difficult to do because his statements were somewhat inconsistent and he rambled on about a myriad of issues. He attacked some people personally who did not agree with his ideas. To advance the discussion and to end the discomfort someone made the motion for a change which captured some of the issues Michael wanted. The vote carried unanimously. While Michael believed his actions displayed leadership because he vocal and willing to risk unpopularity, others saw his behavior differently. Many viewed his comments to group members as disrespectful and because of that they were closed to the ideas he tried to share. It was not what he was saying, but how he was saying it. Outside of the meeting people commented about how important it is to be coherent in communicating and to show respect for others. In prolonged conversations attendees stated that leadership is about effective communication, demonstrating caring for others of the groups to which you belong. Most importantly, one must listen to be thought of as a leader by others. Effective leaders listen with the right approach and respond appropriately to the person who is talking. They are able to express themselves clearly and professionally. They listen for understanding. When there is a match in the communication, successful interactions are the result and conflict is minimized. Asking questions and paraphrasing what is heard ensures two-way communications. Lastly, respectful dialogue creates a supportive environment for the thoughtful expression of differing viewpoints and the exchange of ideas. As shown in this real life example, forcing individual perspectives, verbal attacks and poor listening, can lead to hasty decisions in organizations simply to “ease the pain”. Have you ever found yourself behaving like Michael? If so, people may have commented about you, too, after the fact beyond your earshot. To be an effective leader: Express your ideas in a positive way Talk less, listen more Handle objections to your ideas professionally, not personally
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BLACK BELT LEADERSHIP

Black Belt Leader As Peacemaker

“Peace is a gift, It is a gift we give to ourselves, And then to each other.”

– Richard Goode

I was a young boy once. I had a friend whose family had a Christmas tree, and they weren’t very religious. In fact, they were atheists. Though I didn’t ask my friend about this at the time, I wish I had. Because I’ve always wondered why his family celebrated Christmas; it didn’t make sense to me. But now living here in Tokyo I think I’ve found the answer, and it came the other day while talking with a Japanese woman.

  

I asked, “Why do the Japanese have Christmas trees in their houses? Why do they have Christmas parties and exchange gifts when they aren’t Christians?”

“Because,” she answered, “it’s very peaceful.”

Tokyo 1985

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Recently my wife and I took a cruise to celebrate our wedding anniversary.  While in Cozumel, I stood on the aft deck waiting for clearance to go ashore.  As I waited I saw a submarine crossing the harbor.  After several minutes I noticed a tugboat several hundred feet in front of the submersible ship.  A minute or so later I looked again and it seemed the submarine was following the exact line of travel as the tugboat.  After another minute or so, I looked a third time and noticed the distance between the two vessels seemed not to have changed.  So, as I looked closer, I detected a small cable from the rear of the tugboat and it was attached to the front of the sub.  No wonder the sub was not gaining distance on the tug; the tugboat was towing the submarine! So what do a tugboat and a submarine have to do with leadership?  The answer is that sometimes you might be surprised at who is needed to do the leading.  We all have pre-formed ideas about who or what a leader should do and how it should be done.  We have pre-formed ideas about how a leader should look, speak and dress.  But the bottom line is that the leader must be able to get the job done; no matter what the job may be. Sometimes leadership takes the form of a submarine.  Other times it takes the form and power of a tugboat.  When identifying and developing potential leaders in your organization, don't look only for submarines.  Do not erase from your "potential leaders" list those who appear to be tugboats.  You just might be surprised as to who is able to do the leading!
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The People First® Business Strategy Map: The Ultimate Peak Performance Foundation for Sustainable Success

By Jack Lannom   I’ve got three quick questions for you. First: How does your organization perform at strategic thinking? Most organizations have established a long-term goal or goals more specific than “to remain profitable.” Having established a clear-cut target for future success, your strategic plan should identify all the elements and processes that will make that goal become a reality. Economics Pt 2So I’m assuming that, to echo George Barna, you have chosen to live by design rather than to live by default. You’ve developed a strategic plan, right? Well done! Let me ask you a second question: How many members of your leadership team can clearly, concisely, and confidently articulate that plan? Can every member of your leadership team promptly identify your strategic objectives and the metrics you’re using to track the organization’s progress toward reaching those objectives? Are you feeling just a little uncomfortable as you consider your answer to that question? Just one question to go: How many of your employees can communicate the objectives and metrics linked to your strategic plan? Can you name even a handful? OK, let’s make it easier; how many staffers can communicate the strategic objectives and measures established for their own department? If you truly want to thrive—not merely survive—in business, your answers to these three questions should be: (1) “Yes,” (2) “Everyone,” and (3) “Everyone!” If your answers were not quite so positive, don’t feel too badly; you’ve got lots of company! The BSC Designer group reports these startling statistics:
  • 95% of a typical workforce does not understand its organization’s strategy.
  • 90% of organizations fail to execute their strategies successfully.
  • 86% of executive teams spend less than one hour per month discussing strategy.
  • 70% of organizations do not link middle management incentives to strategy.
  • 60% of organizations do not link strategy to budgeting.[1]
These figures are staggering! It can’t be a surprise that more than 9 out of 10 organizations fail to accomplish their goals when nearly nine out of ten executive teams spend less than one hour per month focusing on those goals and only five per cent of their employees understand them! Forgive me if this statement seems unkind, but this doesn’t sound like “leadership” to me, or even “management,” for that matter . . . it sounds like chaos! The way to turn chaos into coherence and cogency is to examine the way we think about the way we do business. Are we thinking wisely and well? Over the course of the next several weeks, I’d like to point you toward a way of thinking that holds the key to sustainable success. It’s called the People First Business Strategy Map. The Strategy Map will help you to think more philosophically and strategically about your organization so that you, as the leader of your company, begin to think more intentionally, deeply, and wisely about how to grow and improve your organization and help those whom you lead to do the same. In addition to introducing you to our Strategy Map, I’m going to devote some time to talking about thinking; you’ll learn the phrase metacognitive thinking, which essentially means “thinking about your thinking.” You’ll learn some techniques that the best organizational thinkers have mastered in order to take their companies to the next level. And I’ll discuss one of the most basic, one of the most effective—and one of the most overlooked—principles of motivating people available to every business leader. I truly look forward to interacting with you and reading your comments on this series. The tools and techniques I’m going to outline during these articles will be of tremendous benefit to you, both personally and professionally. Let’s get going! www.peoplefirstblog.com  
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TAKING THE SHORTCUT WITHOUT DOING THE HOMEWORK How many times as a leader have you tried to take a shortcut only to discover it was the long road? Maybe you thought you’d take the shorter route determined by MapQuest only to discover fewer miles didn’t equal less time. Or maybe you thought you would forego learning about your past, so you could jump right into the future only to discover your future seems to be a repeat of your past. I’m not advocating that you forget about taking shortcuts. Some shortcuts work. What I am saying that those shortcuts work, because you gained information that allowed you to use the shorter route. What happens to most leaders is they want to take the short cut without doing the homework. THE JANUS EFFECT There is a phenomenon called the “Janus Effect,” which is named after the Roman god who had two faces. Janus had one face which looked forward while the other one looked backward. This allowed him to see the past while facing the future. Wouldn’t this be the ideal situation for you as a leader—to see how you failed or succeeded in the past while making strides toward your goals? The key is not to make the past your future, but to SEE THE PAST AS A STEPPING STONE TOWARD your future. When you make the error of believing what happened in your past is going to occur in your future, you are perpetuating what is going to take place. Perhaps you’ve heard somebody say, “This always happens to me.” If they are referring to something good, that is awesome, but if they are saying that bad things keep happening to them, they are creating more of the same by believing it is going to happen. However the past can serve as a preface for opportunity. When you take the time to examine the past, to become aware of the whys behind the events, to study why you connected with your dreams, or why things didn’t come to fruition, you are altering your possibilities. INTEROGATE YOUR PAST When I was younger, I was known as an antagonist, because I always asked the question, “Why?” What I learned was the majority of the people I “interviewed” (okay interrogated), didn’t have insightful answers to my question. In fact what I learned was that most people did something a certain way, because they had learned it from their parents. Their beliefs mirrored their families. They didn’t take the time to examine their beliefs; they simply accepted them. It is okay to mirror your family’s beliefs if those beliefs are benefitting you. It is when your past beliefs are limiting you that you might decide upon a different course of action. This action does not have to mean that you are right and somebody else is wrong. It simply means that you need to take a different course of action to find your success. Your past can lead you a different direction or it can keep you cemented where you are. When you can examine your highs and lows without judgment, but with an eye for growth, you can understand the central recurring themes of your life. Those themes didn’t just materialize for the first time today. The idea is to spend more time doing your homework, learning from the past, so your future won’t feel like the long road. It will feel like the shortcut.  
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BLACK BELT LEADERSHIP

Black Belt Leader As Beginner: Part Twelve

“But the Hebrew word, the word timshel—‘Thou mayest’— that gives a choice. It might be the most important word in the world. That says the way is open. That throws it right back on a man. For if ‘Thou mayest’—it is also true that ‘Thou mayest not.

? John Steinbeck, East of Eden

How do we as “Black Belt Leaders in the Making” discriminate between what we “may” do and “may not” do? One way is through our intellect: we can use logic. Another is through our bodies — our kinesthetic sense or what is sometimes referred to as our “body wisdom.” Here’s an example of what I mean.

While taking a walk one day in my neighborhood, I passed under an avocado tree that had ripe fruit hanging from its branches. Reflexively, I reached up and picked one that was dangling just above my head. I slid it into my pocket and walked on. It didn’t take long, about a block or two, before I noticed something didn’t feel right in my body. Something was off, thrown out of balance. I kept walking, hoping that this sickening feeling would go away. It didn’t; it only increased in intensity. What’s happening? I wondered. And before the entire thought moved through my mind, I realized what it was — the avocado. Somehow, kinesthetically-speaking, I “understood” that that avocado wasn’t mine. It wasn’t a logical knowing; it wasn’t a moral issue either — that I had taken an avocado from a tree that wasn’t my own. It was simply that my inner sense of integrity had been compromised.  

When I returned home, I got in the car with my avocado ensconced in my jacket pocket and drove back to the house with the avocado tree. I got out of the car, placed the avocado on the doorstep of the house, and presto! My sense of balance returned. The sick feeling in my belly was gone. My body had been trying to tell me — in a way that wasn’t logical yet still true — that taking that avocado in that place and time wasn’t the best choice for me. As a “Black Belt Leader in the Making,” it was important that I listened to what my body was telling me: “Thou mayest not have that avocado.”

What signals has your body been sending you lately that — for whatever reason — you have been ignoring? 

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This post is about one of the most powerful but hidden barriers to change. When people attend leadership training, they are asked to say and do things differently so that they can be more effective as a management team. Perhaps this kind of change involves leading the morning meeting, using an agenda for meetings, assigning action items, following up as promised, etc. These are all value-added activities; however, at the core of these kinds of changes is "BEING" different. Perceptions about leaders are formed by the way they conduct themselves in meetings, at gatherings and behind closed doors. It doesn't take very long for people to form an impression about the values of a leader from these activities. Sometimes people speak or act in a certain way to intentionally create an image with others. Some want to appear as unapproachable or as power figures that are not to be questioned. Others may lack confidence and may not say much at meetings, even though they have good ideas. Observers or people on the receiving end of these communications form opinions about each personality type. When these individuals are asked to change, the personal obstacles will be great. Some individuals may be unwilling to give up the power base they have created; others may not have the courage to lead meetings confidently. Either way, these very personal barriers to change will not be talked about UNLESS there is a high level of trust that permits that kind of conversation without judgment. Once a high trust level is achieved and people begin letting go of old barriers to change, they will make new choices about the image they want to project. At these moments real change is fragile and can be easily discouraged, which means that the rest of the team must allow them to "BE" different without teasing or ridicule. If a management team can trust each other enough to resolve these kinds of issues, they can achieve almost anything together
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Leaders are visionaries. They see the possibilities. They dream the dreams. They imagine extraordinary feats. But they can’t just see the future; they have to be able to convince their team members to see it. When leaders share their vision in a way that others can feel it, they attract more energy toward the belief it can be achieved. This is the motivation which is needed to get beyond the challenges they will face. What helps leaders share their inspired vision? Leaders have to help their team members find their inner motivation. The first step is sharing their passion. When people feel passion, they believe in possibilities. Passion goes beyond time, setbacks, and sacrifices. Passion is a driving force. When leaders share their passion, they are sharing a part of themselves. They are reaching out, giving to others, and showing the idea burning inside them. Through this revelation of caring about making a difference, leaders gain followers.  Team members want to be close to their leaders, to feel what they feel, and to share in their excitement. Enthusiasm is contagious; it spreads to others. But team members aren’t going to jump on board just because their leader is excited; they need to know how their own aspirations and visions can come true. When the leader includes them in the picture and shows them how they will benefit from the shared goal, team members are more likely to remain excited. How can leaders include their team members in their dream?
  • Help your team members understand how you discovered your vision.
  • Engage team members in the goal process.
  • Allow them to see the plan from beginning to end.
  • Listen to their advice and show them you value their words.
  • Hear what is important to your team members.
  • Give them direction but allow them to find the answers.
A visionary understands the vision isn’t the end; it is a means to joining people together for a common goal. Exemplary leaders don’t just hold a vision; they give it energy by sharing it with others. This sharing process includes appealing to team members in such a manner they feel it is their vision. They understand how the accomplishment of the goal will positively affect them. A shared vision involves the passion of all team members. It keeps everyone focused on the future, and provides purpose and drive through obstacles and challenges. When people are engaged in a meaningful endeavor, one that makes a difference in other people’s lives, they find extraordinary resolve to make it happen.  
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What strange thing is man: Born without asking: Lives without knowing: Dies without wanting! …during the course of life, this strange thing called man must properly manage his life if he or she is going to be an effective leader.  Understanding one’s role as a leader means that attention must be given to living by virtue.  Attention must be given to developing noble traits.  In other words, good leaders must rise above the average way of living and excel in such ways that their good character is part of the reason they are able to lead.  By their good qualities and characteristics, leaders are able to earn the respect of others.  There are those who lead with fear and intimidation.  And there are those who have followers only because of the position or title they hold.  But the crowning mark of a good leader is when he or she is respected by those they are leading.* Noble character is part of the recipe in earning the respect of those you lead.  Which friend, acquaintance or associate do you trust enough to ask their honest assessment of your character?  If he or she identifies something less than noble, what will you do?  Your character is important.  If the assessment reveals something negative, I encourage you to not become angry with your friend, but use his or her honesty as an opportunity to improve yourself as a leader. ___________________________ * Mark T. Sorrels, Understanding Your Role As A Leader, (Bloomington, IN, Xlibris Corporation, 2011), 26.
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